642 Things to Write About Challenge: Week 10

“Describe one of your bad habits and why you secretly get joy out of it.”

Oy.  This one is going to make me seem a little bit strange, but I actually came to this very realization over the past few weeks: I love biting my nails.  In full disclosure, I tried to give it up for Lent this year.  Jay hates that I’m a nail biter, so I figured this would be the perfect time to try to kick this habit.

My resolution lasted about 12 minutes.  I try to catch myself – I honestly, truly d0 – but the more I try or think about quitting, I can’t seem to stop it.  It’s mostly an anxiety thing, but biting my nails isn’t something that I only do when I’m bored or feeling anxious.  I chew on my nails when I’m thinking, walking, driving, surfing the ‘Net, watching TV, etc.  It’s at its worst when I’m driving, though.  It’s not so much that I get joy out of biting my nails, but I’ve been doing it probably for the past 25 years, so it’s an act that gives me familiarity and in a way, comfort.  Control, perhaps, though while trying unsuccessfully to stop over the past month, I have at times compared my nail biting habit to that of an out-of-control alcoholic trying to stop drinking.  In fact, I’ve actually gone to bite my nails probably a good 10 times since I’ve started writing this post, haha.  I know it’s a disgusting habit and I know how many germs I’m probably subjecting myself too.  I grew up watching my grandpa and my uncle be chronic nail biters, so I feel like I’m genetically predisposed to this bad habit, haha.  I still hope to beat the system, though.  One day, I’ll quit it!

So, what is your bad habit and what “joy” do you secretly get out of it?

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